In Review: "How to Train Your Dragon 2"

In Review: "How to Train Your Dragon 2"

Anything- absolutely anything- that Dean DeBlois does, I will watch. This movie is just a testament to his impressive skill in writing, storytelling, and originality. This animated sequel could have fallen fate to the classic sequel failure, but it kept its heart in mind. It remembered the reason why people loved the first film- the love between a boy and his dragon.

Plot

 

 

In case you didn't see the first one, that's ok. This one has a quick explanation. Viking town used to hate dragons, but then Boy (Hiccup) teaches the town to love dragons and they all get their own and become dragon riders. Simple. Now, right where the last movie left off, dragons are part of every day life (including a Quidditch-like game of Dragon Racing). But Hiccup and Toothless long to explore the world far beyond their small town of Berk.

(Somehow, Hiccup got ridiculously attractive. Apparently having people like a dork with a dragon was not enough. We had to add long wavy locks and a muscular figure. Whatever.)

In the pair's explorations, they find... Hiccup's mother! (it's not a spoiler- all the trailers tell you this). She was supposedly dead after a dragon attack on the town, but here she is living with all the wild dragons and learning their ways just as Hiccup did.

The happy family reunion doesn't last too long because there is a looming enemy out there who is capturing dragons to create an all-powerful, all-evil dragon army! The whole family and friends must fight to save the dragons.

The Stars

 

 

All the same people from last time are back- Gerard Butler as burly Stoick, Jay Burchel as not-so-wimpy Hiccup, Craig Ferguson as one-legged Gober, America Ferrera as the spunky Astrid, Jonah Hill as Snotlot, Christopher Mintz-Plasse as know-it-all Fishlegs, T.J. Miller as Tuffnut, and Kristen Wiig as Ruffnut.

Joining the cast of hardened Vikings is Cate Blanchett as Hiccup's mother Valka, Kit Harrington (aka John Snow from "Game of Thrones") as Eret, and Djimon Hounsou as the dreaded Drago.

The Message

 

 

I ugly-cried through this one. More than I did in "Maleficent" or "Fault in Our Stars". The reason- Toothless and Hiccup are the perfect pair and remind me of my relationship with my "dragon" Rottweiler-Sheperd Macey. The bond between these two characters is so strong and endearing you can't help but think of your own four-legged best friend or two-legged best friend who loves you unconditionally and without fail will always catch you when you fall.

Hiccup and Toothless's relationship in this film is seriously tested, but their love and any love between man and dragon/dog/cat/hamster cannot be broken. The love between a mother and son or husband and wife can also be renewed even after years of separation- at least that's what this movie says.

DeBlois has taken notes from Disney, which is able to give non-speaking animalistic or inanimate characters amazing ranges of personality, emotion, and character development. This is what allows Hiccup and Toothless to have that deep and endearing bond and gives the film its heart.

Overall

 

 

The script is still funny, the story is still heart-felt and meaningful, the characters are still dynamic and relatable, the art is still breathtaking (how DeBlois comes up with these crazy dragons is unbelievable! One that breathes ice and snow, one that starts typhoons) Everything you loved about the first one returns for a perfect sequel.

4 out of 4 Dragon Riders

 

In Review: 300: Rise of an Empire

In Review: 300: Rise of an Empire

Sometimes you have to be a good friend. Sometimes you just have nothing to do on a Saturday night, and anything sounds better than sitting at home watching more pointless YouTube videos. Sometimes we see bad movies without our consent.

Honestly, how can you get any better than Gerard Butler in a leather diaper bottom? You can't! So why in the world would you even try? As of what I have heard, this sequel/"meanwhile film" has been a flop. No one who loved the original is singing praises for this version. Probably because there are quite a few less shirtless men and rousing Spartan chants.

The Plot

While Gerard Butler is fighting off the crazy God King, Themistocles is trying to get an army together to fight off the evil and insane Persian general Artemisia. He ends up visiting Sparta to ask for help, but they don't want to fight for a free Greece. So they end up going to war with the Persians and of course, they win by the hair on their chinny-chin-chin. Gerard Butler and his army are killed by the God King sometime during this movie, but it is not at all a focus of this story.

The Stars

Eva Green, who plays Artemisia, plays a really great crazy woman. You totally believe that she is insane and out for blood and the souls of all mankind. Not a huge change from her role as love-obsessed Angelique in "Dark Shadows" with Johnny Depp. Her costumes are pretty fantastic though. I would have liked to see Queen Gordo, played by Lena Heady, give the Spartan army a rousing and inspirational battle speech to avenge her hunky husband. We all know Lena Heady can play powerful women (see "Game of Thrones").

The Message

I guess it's that the weak can conquer the strong? There's some references to the importance of freedom and duty and honor, but they are not driving the wimpy plot.

And to go with the cheapness of the sequel, the whole thing was done in 3D like they knew this sequel would not make enough money if it was only shot in regular D. I refused to see the film in 3D, but I had to sit through ridiculous cartoon blood spraying in my face and dust particles floating in the air of every scene that didn't have blood. No one can see those particles in real life! Why are they in this movie? And there was too much slow motion in this film. It didn't add to the drama but made the film even more cheesy.

Overall

This movie is about a sexually deprived woman who is using the passion of war to get excited. Yeah, that's really what it's about. There's no character development. There's no heart-wrenching goodbye scenes or inspiring battle speeches. But there is a crazy hate-sex scene between Themistocles and Artemisia, which I don't think I will ever be able to erase from my mind. Yuck.

.5 out of 4 Greek Soldiers (that could totally be a thing)